...how do I erase (peel off) my childhood interior design choices (stickers)?

Soooo when I was little, my parents bought me a really nice, solid wooden dresser. While my mom tried to make sure I took care of it, my dad was definitely the more indulgent. When I entered the Bermuda Triangle of little girl sticker phases, he let me "just put one sticker on". Sure. One sticker.

Now that I'm an adult who has her own apartment but can't afford decent furniture, I figured, "Why not dust off that old dresser, paint it up all super cute, and be all fancy chic?" Reduce, reuse, recycle! Just about, ohhhh, 1,584 stickers to get off first. So here's some how-to:

-Nail polish remover, thanks Huff Post!

-Peanut butter?? Mayo? WD-40, and basically anything with oil, allegedly. Hmm. Gross.

-White vinegar (I had a roommate that 'cleaned' everything with this. Seems like a Catch-22.)

-Lighter fluid? This seems like a terrible idea.

-Goo Gone (oh, really? The goo remover removes goo? Ohhhh thaaaaanks)

By far the most similar question and useful answers came from Metafilter, which I hasn't consciously heard of. People copped to things that made me feel better, too. :) ("To remove 30 year old Star Wars stickers from an old painted wooden door...")  So I stopped there, and decided to just scrape the damn things off with a scraper and use nail polish remover on whatever was left. I'm painting and sticky-wallpaper-ing it anyhow. So the pre- is up above, and I'm not quite at "post" yet... will update soon.

Oh, the spatula irony.